Going back to the winter of 2010, my roommates and I received an unexpected visit from an old friend who was back in town (we'll call him Kirk, for this paper's sake). Kirk was more an acquaintance to myself and one of my roommates, but was definitely seen as a "good friend" to my other roommate, who was delighted to see him at our door.
Kirk came to us disheveled, claiming that his father had finally kicked him out of the house. He had been living there for a long time, as had actually never been out on his own before at any point in his life. The truth of the matter was, he actually used to have a drug problem, and had been in and out of rehabilitation a couple of times prior to this. We asked if he had relapsed, which he denied, and even insured us that he had been clean for over a year. While I was very speculative, here was an individual that I did like and care for, and he was standing at my front door utterly homeless.
Soon after Kirk's arrival, he belted out the question that we had all been waiting for, "can I stay with you guys for a few days?" At the time it seemed harmless, and we said that if he needed a place to crash for a couple of nights, that would be fine. He was happy to hear this, and soon nestled in on the couch where he would remain for longer than we had ever anticipated.
It wasn't until Kirk had been there for almost two weeks that I mentioned anything about my frustrations to my roommates. He did work 4-5 days per week as a waiter, but if he wasn't at work, he was planted in our living room. You see, Kirk had turned our downstairs into his bedroom, as his clothes were strewn across the banister of our staircase like a dry cleaning establishment, and he had turned our couches into a sleeping quarter. He had moved the furniture around to fit his needs, and would come and goes as he pleased, sometimes not returning until well into the night (early AM).
Though this was a frustration, we knew he was still homeless. I gathered my roommates to have a quick discussion about the situation. Kirk wasn't my "direct friend," as I mentioned before, but my roommate who saw him that way was never one to make tough leadership decisions. My other roommate always "went with the flow," and was bothered, but not enough to initiate a change - at least at the time. I talked to the guys, utilizing team building techniques such as focus and cooperative conversation, and we all agreed that Kirk could stay if he started paying us rent. Rent would be $75/week, divided by the three of us. He wouldn't have to pay utilities, and could use everything in the house at his convenience.
We approached Kirk the next day, and I laid everything out. He seemed thrilled with the idea, knowing that he still didn't have a definite place to call home. He made fairly good money as a waiter, and wouldn't have any problems paying the rent. He even told us that his Dad had been charging him $500/month, and that this would be a cakewalk for him financially.
Week one went and passed without a rent payment from Kirk. Maybe he forgot, or didn't know who to give it to? Who knows, maybe he'd worked things out, and was getting ready to go back to his Dad's house? We let it slide, and waited until week two to bring up the issue. As week two arrived, I again had to be the one to confront him. I did a personal style inventory on myself, and then a style inventory on each of my roommates. I was the only one with the gumption to confront Kirk about the rent payment at this point. With that said, I went ahead and asked him about the money. He told me that he was waiting to be paid, and would have it all on Friday. We gave him the benefit of the doubt.
By the time the third week of Kirk's free stay had come and passed, I realized that we weren't going to be getting any money from him. Was it because he didn't have any money, or, did he just not see it fit to pay us? I enlisted the help of another friend of mine, who actually spoke with Kirk quite often. What he told me at that point shocked me. Kirk had been "using: again, and buying drugs with his tip money on a daily basis. He never had any intention of paying us, and was hoping that we would just turn the blind eye. He also had never paid rent to his father in the months building up to this, and the idea that he was required to was also completely fabricated.
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